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Things Noah Says / Does #27

At 5.5 years old, N is still pretty gullible, and sometimes, it drives me a bit nuts, because I cannot understand why he believes everything and anything he’s been told. C says I will mourn the loss of his innocence when he’s older, which I agree, but gosh, it’s really amazing to hear all the stories he tells me that his friends told him.

N: Mummy, you know, M told me that last night, he came to our house when we were all sleeping, and he did cartwheels and backflips in our living room! Then he hit the fish tank, but luckily, the fish didn’t fall out.

Me: Erm, that’s not possible, N… M didn’t come to our house last night…

N: No, really! He said he did!

Me: He was bluffing you. We would have heard him, right, if he were in our house?

N: No, we were sleeping!

Me: …


N: Mummy, do you know that my friend A has this super cool watch? Yesterday, the Bluebird bus kept calling her on her watch, so funny!

Me: Huh? How can a bus call her, and on her watch? Is her watch a phone?

N: It’s true! It kept calling her, but she’s like, “Stop calling me!”

Me: Did you see it?

N: No, there’s no picture on her phone, only the time.

Me: Then how do you know it’s calling her?

N: Because she tells me! It goes, “Poooorrrrrhhhhh, pooooorrrrrrhhhhh!” Like that. Even when she’s at home at night, it calls her.

Me: …


N: Mummy, A doesn’t need her Mummy to pick her up from school, you know? Her watch can bring her anywhere she wants!

Me: Huh? What do you mean? How can her watch bring her anywhere?

N: Ya! Her watch does everything for her. When she wants to buy something, she takes it, and the watch pays for it.

Me: Erm okayyyy…

N: Then she presses a button, and a person comes out to bring her anywhere she wants to go also. But she can’t get into her house, because she needs to get the key from her Mummy.

Me: How is that even possible? Does that even make sense to you, N?

N: Yes, it’s true! A told me!

Me: Doesn’t mean that she told you means it’s true… she’s bluffing you, N.

N: But she said it, so it’s true.

Me: Not everything that your friends tell you is true. Okay, last night, I saw a flying unicorn. Oh, and just now, a dinosaur came to our house and ate Didi up.

N: Noooooo…

Me: But Mummy said it, means it’s true, right?

N: Erm, no, but A told me, so it’s true.

Me: I give up.

Me and my little Mr Gullible on one of our our weekly lunch dates

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