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Silly Things We Say / Do #42

A friend of mine shared this article about IVF’s ‘tarnished halo’ on her Facebook feed the other day, and I couldn’t stop thinking about it.

Before Noah was born, I admit that I was very worried that he wouldn’t resemble either of us, and that the embryos weren’t actually ours. This was especially scary as there was a previous IVF mix-up at Thomson Medical Centre, and the possibility of it happening to us, however low, was definitely still there.

After Noah was born, and as he grew older, most people who saw us together would comment that he looked exactly like me or my dad. I tried very hard to find resemblances between him and C, but couldn’t. I frequently secretly worried that the sperm used to create the embryos, wasn’t actually C’s. I didn’t discuss my fear with C, because I knew he would tell me to stop being paranoid, but when I read this article, the fear overwhelmed me, and I had to talk to C about it.

I know that being biologically related isn’t a prerequisite for being a good parent, but I couldn’t help but wonder how Noah would feel, if he found out that he wasn’t related to C by blood. This is completely hypothetical, of course. We have no cause to believe that there was any mix-up at all during the IVF process.

Me: What if you aren’t biologically related to Noah?

C: Then like that lah.

Me: I’m serious! What if he wants to find his biological father?

C: Biological father? Then he should go and study Biology.

All joking aside, I pray that there wasn’t any mix-up, and that Noah inherits my aptitude for languages, and his father’s brains for all other subjects. I think he gets his sunny disposition from me, though C begs to differ, so we’ll just have to agree to disagree on that. 😛

PS. When I started writing this post, it was meant to be a serious one, as I was really worried about the possibility that there was a mix-up. However, I decided to classify it under Silly Things We Say/Do because of C’s response, and ultimately, I think it IS something silly to worry about. We love Noah to bits, and nothing would change that.


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